Love Rats
SUMMARY:
Famous lovers from throughout history assemble to confess their caddish romances in "Love Rats".
Parody of The Love Cats by The Cure
LYRICS:
I'm Henry VIII, as you know, I'm the King who married six
But I'm not what you call romantic, though
In fact, in love, I was the pits.
Cath and Jane and Cath all ended up divorced or dead.
I'm just the same, Nero's the name
Killed my wife, sent my girlfriend the gift of her head.
Then Poppaea met a bad end
Kicked and beaten, I'm the worst boyfriend.
That's what I was doing
When I was wooing my wife Matilda
What? I never killed her!
Love Rats
I only married once, shouldn't be in this song.
Love Rats
William the Conqueror, you are wrong!
It wasn't just men, some rats were wonderfully pretty.
I'm Cleopatra, loved a match that offered power.
Married one brother, he died, I wed another but he wasn't the one for me.
Julius Ceaser, my next romantic squeeze, ended up with Mark Anthony.
His death was your fault, as I recall -
Didn't mean for that to happen at all -
Still think I shouldn't be here, I held my wife dear -
After you bullied her, I'd say its fully fair.
Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba,
Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba.
Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba,
Ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba.
Love rats
Who are you? You don't look bad.
Love rats
Edward VIII, twentieth century lad.
Edward the Eight? Now there's no debate
You really shouldn't be here!
I do agree, though love conquered me,
Abdicated the throne for Wallis Simpson, dear.
Love rats
Wallis divorced, so I was forced to pick -
Love rats
Between love and crown - you chose love, that's sick!
Love rats
Was a national crisis when I stepped down as King.
Love rats
Moonlight and roses, not really our thing!
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